I have been lost. Four years ago, I joined the corporate world in pursuit of stability, safety and a “good job” - all the things that seem to follow suit when you do what you’re supposed to do after college.
In the handful of rejections I received from publishers during and right after my MFA, I believed that the creative writing world had given up on me. In reality, I gave up on it. But maybe more accurately, I never gave it the chance. I know that everyone gets rejected. And as a woman of color, the cards are stacked against me in ways that they aren’t for others. For reasons that I’m now realizing but won’t articulate here, I have felt more and more rejected by the “academic community”.
And I don’t mean for so many of my posts to hover around this theme of rejection. Filipino-American. Published poet. Academic. I have formed ideas around what these identities are supposed to mean and tried to fit myself into them based on what I witness around me. When, this whole time, maybe it needs to be the other way around. I am these things regardless of whether or not I conform to an archetype.
I don’t want to be lost anymore. I want to own the words I have written. To pursue creativity, truth, and all things that remain mysterious to the human existence. I can self-publish. I can seek out seasoned and developing writers to connect with. I can make this entrepreneur thing work. In both business and personal projects, it’s about finding your people.
And there isn’t very much to it - other than the fact that when you live with purpose, talk about it...you’ll meet others who believe what you believe and want to share or be a part of it. Lately, I’ve met a handful of people who are interested in joining a writing group. Many are those who have always thought about or wanted to write but never knew where or how to start. If this is you, get in touch. I’m making something happen and I’d love for you to be part of it.